I Found Your Purpose

As I sat in a tree overlooking the waves on the south side of Maui yesterday, a friend of mine shared with me that he sees every human's core purpose as "Expansion of Consciousness."

"Anytime we're engaging in expansion," he said, "we feel like we're on point. We receive releases of dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin, and the brain starts performing at an accelerated rate." Expansion makes us happy.

In the early days of human evolution, that played out as "Expansion of Territories," leading to conquest and domination of land and peoples. Problem is, now we've expanded to fill almost every little corner of our galactic floating stone, and STILL feel the need to expand...so we begin to explore what the sages have been sharing for centuries...expansion of the inner territories.

When we're truly present in a moment of play with our children, we're expanding into bliss.

When we're present with our sister on the phone, we're expanding into compassion.

When we're actively engaged in some piece of passionate action, we're expanding into purpose.

So as long as we keep learning, exploring epiphanies, sharing meaningful moments and opening our hearts, we are serving our core purpose. It looks a little different for everyone, but at root it's the same...and we don't have to bump one another off the rock to do it. :)

Of course with every expansion comes contraction...the exhale...and often-times that feels like painful limitation. But, if there's no opposition, nothing to flee or push into, then our expansion is invisible...completely without sensation, and without sensation we have no measure of success...without sensation, we have no pleasure.

Now, there's no need to be leveled by the opposing forces. The difference between surfing and drowning in the 40-foot faces of a north-shore winter swell is simple planning and preparation.

Understanding that contraction is GOING to happen, we can program it in...consciously stepping out of life's traffic...finding moments of silence and unavailability in order to more gracefully ride the wave.

Then we can meet our hurdles and limitations with compassion and understanding, thus raising the vibration of the encounter and initiating expansion once again.

Long story short: Don't worry about finding your purpose. Sit still, follow your bliss, and expand into it. Find the shiny, and get busy gettin' big.

Much Love

The Truth About Altruism

We are, all of us, selfish little creatures.

Have you ever done anything purely for the benefit of someone else? Have you ever engaged in any activity that uplifted another but didn't serve you at all?

Don't worry, I haven't either.

Once upon a time I wanted to go to Thailand. Because I was deeply steeped in the conversation of seva (selfless service) and I wanted to be a "good person," I started building walls of altruism around my trip. I was going to bring fresh water and clean latrines to the mountain village people. I was going to provide compassionate touch to orphan babies. I was going to study with the Wat Po monks and bring REAL Thai Massage back to the states and heal the pains of my community...

With these claims came self-entitled demands and efforts. I threw fund-raisers. I got a friend to let me live with him, rent-free for 3 months. I hit my family up for cash...all because I had the foresight and fortitude to make the world a better place, completely bereft of personal benefit.

Right.

Secretly, in the back room of my mind, I entertained visions of lazily writing a book in a beach bungalo, practicing yoga in the sand with 3 Thai girls while they massaged me, daily.

In those quiet synaptic corners, mentioned only in whispers, I was backpacking through exotic temples and riding motorcycles with gorgeous, mysterious European women.

In my dreams, I was basking in the spotlight as a great and profound teacher of eastern practices and philosophy, wooing my audience with sordid stories of my travels, melting hearts with tales of all the good I'd done.

In my head, I was a hero.

I never went to Thailand.

My fundraising efforts all went belly-up. Things went sour between my buddy and me, and I lost my free room. I failed hard, forced to face myself and all of my glaring inauthenticities.

Wah wah.

As much as we hold altruism and selfless service as ideals, none of us will ever reach them. No matter what we do, we do it for some semblance of self-service. We're aimin' for good karma. We're getting great publicity out of alignment with that super-sexy African charity. Or maybe it's just a case of heart-warming yummy fuzzies when we pay for that woman's groceries as she scrounges for quarters from the bottom of her purse.

In every case, there's a reward, and that reward is what we're really after.

There's no such thing as a selfless act.

Now, knowing that, why don't we go ahead and get really clear on what it is that we really want?

When you can stop pretending that the work you do in the world is all for the benefit of your others, you can start moving from a truly powerful place...the land of grounded reality.

In the land of grounded reality, there's no shame in our motives.

In the land of grounded reality, we understand that every human has needs, and that the best way to meet most of our own is to help others meet theirs.

In the land of grounded reality, you actually become a benefit to humanity, sans stickiness...sans ambiguity...sans bullsh*t.

So...ask yourself: WHAT DO I WANT?

When you have the answer (any answer), start moving in that direction. Along the way, you'll encounter other movers. Ask them what they want. If you can help them, do so. Don't forget your own journey, just team up for a few, learn a little bit, and behold the beauty of a dream coming to fruition.

If you don't know what you want, go ahead and ask someone else. Jump on a moving train. In helping them accomplish their goals, your desires will start to shine. When they do, move on 'em.

Had I known this years ago, I would have some great Thai stories to tell you today. I would have worked really hard to personally pull together the necessary resources, and probably still have done some great, heart-opening charity work, with pics to prove it up on my website.

But then I wouldn't have done a lot of the other cool stuff that brought me to this perfect seat on this perfect day.

Live and learn, right?

A wise man once said, "I know it's not all about me, but I'm the only one I think about all the time."

It's time to put that grey matter to good use, clearly and effectively, then watch the world bloom before you.

Tell me, my friend: WHAT DO YOU WANT?

Perfecting Posts

I've made a commitment to start blogging more...creating plenty of posts to get the words out, flesh out the thoughts for all to see...to be more specific, I committed to blogging every day.

I'd like to renegotiate that commitment. Blogging daily is one helluva commitment. I could do it, sure, and just post journal entry after journal entry...but I've found that that becomes REAL boring REAL fast. Creating a good blog post is like writing an essay back in the school days. You've gotta find a topic worth writing on, create a few drafts, walk away from it, come back and tweak it, change the title 17 times, then finally it's ready for review. Or, you drop some brilliance in an instant and done is done...but the spirit's gotta be there, and that spirit is a fickle bitch sometimes.

I've been sitting on one post in particular. You'll see it soon enough. I started writing about a parallel I discovered between the teachings of don Juan (as told by Carlos Castaneda) and the marketing formulas and strategies I've been studying. When I finished writing, I realized that though it sounded poetic and beautiful, it didn't really leave the reader with anything you could use...no strong takeaway other than the momentary journey. So I started crafting something modeled on some of the instructional blogs I've been perusing...and it became a project. Now, I stand behind this little project's merit, but at the moment I've been so busy meeting deadlines for a marketing campaign that I haven't had time to sculpt and shape and hone my offering into something tasty for your table.

So, my friend, this is my renegotiation. I'll have that blog completed by this coming Friday. In the meantime, I'll post some other thoughts and musings from the Isle of Maui. Honestly, it's been eating me up to not post anything...personal integrity. Sheesh.

For now, it's time for yoga.

Have a beautiful day.

How To Find Your Money

"When I had finished smoking, don Juan told me that we were there so I could find out the kind of game I was supposed to hunt. He carefully repeated three times that the most important aspect of my endeavor was to find some holes. He emphasized the word 'holes' and said that inside them a sorcerer could find all sorts of messages and directions...He repeated at various times that I should focus all my attention on listening to sounds and do my best to find the holes between the sounds."

~Carlos Castaneda, A Separate Reality

Many a master has said that it's the space between that holds the mystery...the magic of existence. Music is experienced between the notes, life is what happens when you're busy making other plans, and Spirit whispers when we stop to take a breath.

As we soften and peer into these "holes," a great deal is revealed. The womb of the Mother shares her secrets.

So what does this have to do with money and marketing?

In the masculine game of domination and conquest, we seek holes to fill. We listen closely to the sounds of those around us...those whom we wish to serve (usually those who can afford our services) to determine their interests. Then we expand our awareness to also listen closely to the business leaders already fulfilling many of the needs of our audience, and find the holes left in the cross-hatch...the areas of demand not currently met.

Those holes hold inspiration and invigoration. They also hold money.

In Castaneda's tale, once a hole was discovered, he and don Juan spent the rest of the day discerning the message, then weeks in preparation and travel to accumulate the resources needed to find the perfect platform from which they could form an alliance with a powerful spirit.

In the same way, once we, as businessmen and marketers, find that hole in the market, we've gotta figure out what it means, train and prepare through long hours and hard work, and dive in to create something worth offering to our perfect, powerful audience. We give them what they want, better than anyone else can, because we're willing to dive deeper than anyone else and burn to find the answers that most folks won't.

So listen close...your money is calling.

Dancing With Demons

"The way of love is not a subtle argument.

The door here is devastation.

Birds make great skycircles of their freedom.

How do they do it? They fall,

And in falling they're given wings." ~Rumi

I'm a lover. It's my nature, it's what I do. I fall hard, fast and DEEP, and all to often, it's a blissfully painful experience.

I awoke this morning with a pain in my shoulder and the memory of a recent lover playing in my brain. Immediately I checked my blackberry to see if she'd contacted me via fb, gmail or good ol' fashioned text message. She had, but the deeper aspects of conversations were left untouched. She played on the surface, keeping a foot in the door, but no more...

The steel turns.

On the other side of my dome dances another recent love who wants, perhaps, too much. She pulls for my affection in manners all too familiar, and I watch the love that engulfs her bring out the best of her beauty in manic expressions of poetic brilliance. Psychotic obsession leads to some of the best art mankind has ever known. Whether that obsession is a fire for God, a die-hard world-worn quest, or the all-consuming love of another human, it doesn't matter. It's the spark within that does the trick...but I'd be damned if I called it comfortable for anyone.

Conventional wisdom dictates that I shouldn't care. My primary focus is and should be my mission, my purpose, the work at hand...but still this soft heart of mine beats pink and vibrant, and is easily aroused by those with whom I choose to open. History shows that I'm willing to give it all, gamble everything and torch the ships in the name of love, branding me with a string of names too long to claim...terms of endearment...bile-ridden insults...all of 'em stick and none of 'em hold, just like life.

Yeah, I shouldn't care, but I do. This fuels me. Towards what, I'm not sure, but it feels like aliveness, and that can't be a bad thing. So many days I've spent in comfortable numbness, quietly longing for the flames of life to lick my skin and make me feel again. Here I am, in the fire...wanting what's just beyond my reach.

Stretching.

Growing.

Living this Love.

God help us all.

Dive Right In

This morning I woke up in Maui.

Immediately anxiety wrapped her rusty barbed-wire fingers around my spine. Crazy, I know. My first day in paradise, all my bills are paid, I'm surrounded by friends, but still I'm gripped with fear and sandy-souled discontent. I felt cagey, ungrounded, unsure of what to do.

My morning routine is usually something semblance of the following:

-lay in bed for 20 minutes, semi-coherently contemplating my dreams, or lack thereof.

-pee.

-meditate for 20-30 minutes.

-triple sh.

-brew a hot cup of earl grey.

-make up half a song on the six-string.

-forget to write it down.

-call some people.

-sit down and get to work.

But this morning I woke up IN MAUI.

Do you get the implications of the circumstances?

That initial breath of plumeria-scented sea air dictates a whole new set of plans. What do you do first in a houseful of friends on Paradise Island? Get coffee? Wake up everyone else? Twenty-seven Sun Sals? Harmonica solo? Eat a papaya? Shower naked in the back yard?

Then consider that I'm here on business, and the man who signs my paychecks and expects nothing short of my greatness was stirring upstairs.

What primary activity would set the right tone, reinforce my egg-shell positive personal self image, establish professional responsibility AND make me look really cool to my house-mates? Arghhhhh!!!

So I did what any self-respecting adventurer would do. I pulled on some pants and a t-shirt and went for a walk. I found a wrought-iron gate with a "No Trespassing" sign and jumped it. I shimmied down a pole and bouldered down the beach on black volcanic babies of Pele. I swam in the warm waters of Na Maka O Ka hai as Surya crested the far off mountains, filling the heavens with pink, orange and brilliant white.

I dove right the f**k in.

Afterwards, as I ambled back to the house, barefoot and skyclad from the waist up, giggling at the clouds and talking to the trees, the jazz of creation began to make sense to me. Once again I was reminded that when we don't know what to do, we just gotta do SOMETHING, and listen for the cues.

I rolled up on my compatriots engaging in sweet and simple morning activities...sipping ceylon, down-dogging in the driveway, reading a book...and with salt on my skin and sand in my hair, I looked mad cool. :)

Uncertainty and her sister, Miss Tension once again crept in, but I had begun my day in my own way, and moving forward was simply a matter of continuing the course.

I took a shower, made some tea, touched my guitar and got to work.

It's been a beautiful morning in Maui.

rainy days

I've spent the last two days holed up with my computer and a series of cups of piping hot tea, Earl Grey in the morning, peppermint, rooibos and chamomile as the day wears on. While I generally like to spend my time outside, enjoying the fresh oxygen from these surrounding trees and playing with my friends, I've enjoyed these quiet days of solitude. They give me the temporal presence (time and space :) I need to do the inner work...to step into the General's Tent. From this place, magic happens.

This morning I woke up late and rolled slow through the early day, taking my time taking my shower, eating, getting dressed, playing on facebook...all the while knowing full well that I had work to do and (softly) kickin' my own ass for knowingly procrastinating.
Finally, after a couple rounds of aimless pacing around my apartment, avoiding riding my bike in the rain to go get a cappuccino, I parked myself in my special spot and closed my eyes to meditate.
I was in for quite a while, feeling the anxious tug to come out and get active, but feeling an even stronger drive to sit still a little while longer and breathe a little deeper.
After about 45mins (easily double my morning dose), I omm'd home and threw in a hyper-oxygenating breath technique for good measure, bowed in appreciation for the day, prayed to have my obstacles removed, said amen and sat back up.

AT THAT MOMENT, there was a knock on my door. I figured it was the apartment crew coming to fix my garbage disposal, but when I opened my door, I found my friendly downstairs neighbor, Denise, standing there with a smile. She told me she was about to leave to run some errands, and wanted to know if I needed anything. "No-one," she said, "should have to ride their bike in the rain." :)

I caught a lift to Starbucks with her, and as I've sat here, waiting for it to stop raining, I've gotten caught up on all the internet-based computer work that I've been dodging for the last week or so. What a blessing.

When I was a kid, rainy days were my cue to bust out the coloring book and crayons, play-dough and plastic scissors, glue, construction paper and old magazines. They were some of my favorite days to play.

As I got older, rainy days triggered depression, isolation and introversion, sometimes lasting for weeks.

Now I think I'll blend the two. Bust out the colors and get hella introspective. Quiet the mind and go inside long enough to talk to God.

The rain just let up a little. I think it's time to go home.

Namaste, and God bless.